I told you about the things I’m obsessed with, it’s only fair to tell you the things that I absolutely detest.
Okay, maybe that’s too strong of a statement. Let’s just put it this way, I strongly dislike these things. Like I said, I always feel strongly about everything and everyone.
I’m sure some of the things in this list are your least favorite things too. I’m not assuming, it’s just reality that if I put things like “traffic jams”, chances are most people hate them. Does anyone like traffic jams?
But anyway, let’s start off this list properly, shall we?
These are a few of my least favorite things:
1/ Crocs. I know, they’re extremely comfortable and they’re medically designed and all that bullshit, but let’s face it. They’re ugly! I get that “ugly is beautiful” is their concept and their schtick, and kudos to them for being able to market it brilliantly, but seriously, people. As an 11-year-old told me the other day, “They look okay on me, but I’m 11. When adults wear them, they always look stupid.” Ah, from the mouth of babes.
2/ Traffic jams. This is pretty self-explanatory. Does anyone actually enjoy traffic jams?
3/ Intense heat. I live in the land of perpetual summer, where temperatures don’t go below the high 70s (or high 20s if you’re using Celsius) even in the “coldest time of the year”. It’s always so hot and humid, I never get to wear gorgeous coats or boots and what’s worse is my skin gets all oily and blotchy, my hair always frizzes like Monica when she was in Barbados (okay, not THAT bad, but you get what I mean), and not to mention the fact that I sweat all the time without even having to move a muscle. What’s worse: it’s the same all year round. I really miss the biting chill of winter, the kind of cold that makes my nose bleed sometimes.
4/ Weddings. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s great to see two people who truly love each other promise their undying love in front of their friends and families. I have no problem with that. But weddings here are not about that. It’s about: inviting a thousand people to crowd a grand ballroom, bad buffet food, standing party (what’s worse is that the food is “real” food, which means, you gotta try to eat a plate of steak standing up. I’m dead serious), bride and groom (and their parents) standing in a raised platform having to shake hands with a thousand of their guests, most of whom they don’t even know, for hours and we the guests have to line up to shake their hands, no open bar, not even a drop of alcohol is provided (unless you go to a billionaire’s wedding), bad make up, sky-high hair, ugly poofy wedding dresses (that have to be returned the next day, I’m so serious, no one buys wedding dresses here, they rent from a bridal store), and conversations with strangers that begin with, “So, when is it going to be your turn?” Weddings bring out the worst in me, so I try to avoid them as much as possible, and I limit myself to only attending one wedding a year. So far it has worked out pretty well.
5/ Reality television. The only “reality show” I love to watch is Project Runway, but it’s more about a competition, and let’s face it, those contestants have to really work their asses off, and the challenges they have to do every week – they’re tough, man! Imagine having to craft a dress from Hershey’s wrapper or supermarket items (that includes fresh produce). But the other reality shows, like those dating shows, or The Hills, The City and whatever else is out there – including, and especially, Jon & Kate Plus 8 – I absolutely detest. I mean, seriously, what’s so great about watching a family consisting of a deadbeat dad, a bitchy mom and eight kids in a row? Well, okay, I get the attraction but still. There’s something seriously wrong with society if it takes a family in ruin to entertain us.
6/ Perez Hilton. Okay, the first time I read his gossip blog, I have to admit I was pretty entertained. But over the last few years, he has crossed the line. His blogs are no longer entertaining, they’re just vicious and petty, insulting everyone that’s ever had any semblance of fame all in the name of “entertainment”. No, I don’t find it entertaining when he picks on a certain celeb for gaining weight. I mean, come on! How is that scandal? Women gain weight all the time. And it’s not like they balloon to 300 pounds in two days. And when he got beat up by Black Eyed Peas’ manager (that earned him the nickname “Black Eyed Perez”), I was disgusted by his “dramatic” video. Like, come on dude! If you make a living by insulting everyone in the universe, is it really any wonder that someone finally takes a punch at you? Even my gay friends are totally disgusted by him, saying that he gave gay people a bad name, and I have to say I agree with them.
7/ Speidi. Seriously, is there anyone in the whole universe that actually likes them? From Heidi making a “I want to be Mother Theresa” comment to Spencer and all his douche-baggery, the world could actually benefit from their disappearance to obscurity.
8/ Crowds. I guess this comes with being a hermit. I feel suffocated when I’m in a large crowd, so I try to avoid it as much as possible. And, since I live in a city of 11 million people, the only way to avoid crowd sometimes is by staying home, which brings us back to the fact that I’m a hermit.
9/ Male chauvinist pigs. Seriously, it’s 2009. Being a chauvinist is so last century. Get with the program.
10/ Posers. I know, just like traffic jams, no one likes them too. But I have to put them in this list in honor of my ex-client, who’s the biggest poser I’ve ever met in my entire life. But seriously, nothing is more annoying that someone who is not intelligent/deep/creative/artistic/smart/rich/etc pretending to be one. What’s so wrong about just being yourself? Chances are, people who don’t like you for you are not worth impressing anyway.
What are the things that make you go “ew”?