The Man: “Why do you have so many pictures of people riding bicycles anyway? You can’t even ride a bike!”
Me: “Well, maybe my subconscious is telling me that I should learn! Maybe I will!”
The Man: “Ha! You do know that they don’t make tricycles for adults, don’t you?”
Me: “Shut up.”
Yes, I really can’t ride a bike. I tried to learn once when I was a kid, but then I fell and I didn’t want to try again because my sister – along with the nanny and the maids – laughed at me. I was a spoiled brat who didn’t like to be laughed at, so I just didn’t try.
But now I’m moving to the suburbs… or whatever passes for a suburb in this city. Anyway, my new house is tucked inside a cul-de-sac in this huge real estate just a little outside of the city. It’s adorable, the row of houses and the fact that they’re all so pristine and identical reminds me of Desperate Housewives’ Wisteria Lane. But it’s also so far away from the main road. And since I can’t drive (there’s a lot of normal kid/teenager thing I missed out on… like learning how to ride a bike and how to drive), it means I need to depend on my mom or the driver to actually leave the cul-de-sac.
Unless I want to walk for miles, which in this kind of tropical heat could almost mean the death of me. Well, I exaggerate. I might just pass out.
So maybe I should really learn how to ride a bike, it seems the right thing to do to ensure that I don’t turn into a creepy shut-in once I move.
Easier said than done, though. I am so uncoordinated. I might fail miserably like Phoebe in Friends. It’s a very real possibility.
Nonetheless, my mom is thinking of buying a bike for my maid so she can get around the housing complex easily. Which means, soon enough I’ll be able to learn. Provided someone is patient enough to teach me.
However, The Man is right. He almost always is, but don’t tell him that.
I predict that even after my mom buys a bicycle, I will spend most of my days figuring out the cutest “riding a bike” outfit – and never really actually getting on the bike to learn.
Ah well, it’s the thought that counts, right?
“I want to ride my bicycle… I want to ride my bike…”
There’s a reason why Freddy Mercury wrote that song. Maybe he also wanted to learn to ride a bike like me?
Will I ever learn to ride a bicycle?
At this point, I doubt anyone can answer that.